You know...holidays..

So..it is Christmas Eve and I am in my parent's apartment in Quincy. Admittedly I've been struggling this week more than I expected, because I'm used to wrapping up my semester and heading "home" to Worcester for nearly two weeks for the holidays. This year...well..it will be different. However, I am discovering little by little (and mind you, I know this intellectually, but not quite emotionally) that different isn't always bad.

A little more background for you...my parents decided to move and sell the house during the holidays last year, so we (my brothers and I) were aware that last Christmas might be the last in the house. Now, know that I didn't always love the house...we were not always friends. We moved there when I was 9 years old. 9...also the year I got sick and was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease. I spent many years being fairly ill in that house..BUT there were also great times as well. Birthday parties in the dining room. My high school graduation party where Jenn, Kara, Anne and Raina and I released balloons with messages written on them in my backyard. The going away party for myself and Tara when we went "abroad" to Washington DC our junior year of college. The joint graduation party for my brother Matt and me from college (him from RPI and me from Anna Maria).

Little by little, the house became my retreat. It is where I came home from college when I needed a break. It is where I retreated after the worst breakup of my life (and stayed for several days). It was my sanctuary during many years of "living in"...working in Student Affairs and living in residence halls. It is where I arrived after being stranded in Atlanta on 9/11 and having my father drive to get me, and drive me home because "that's what you do when your child is stuck." It was my place.

So here we are...a year later. The house sold in June and the move took place in July. To be honest, after months of giving away and throwing away and dumpsters and "do you want this?"...I felt kind of over the move in July and thought "Great! This is easier than I thought!"

Now comes the holidays...and I am missing #9. Not for the physical structure, but for what it provided me. For the "picture in my head" of what the holidays look like.

So..I am creating a new picture...or trying to at least. Last night I had a holiday party for friends at Wheaton in my apartment and today I was able to spend some time with my best friend in the world in her childhood home. Arrived in Quincy at around 5:15 and had a lovely dinner with my parents and Dan and Alecia and then watched home movies from Christmas' past in the house. It was a nice transition...

Today was a good day. Tomorrow will be the real test...

Santa...I'd like another healthy year, more time with my friends, and a crock pot.

Happy Holidays all my loveys!!

Here we go...

So...it is December, 2009 and I am 34 years old. Why is this important? Because I am in a place of transition...and I hope there are people out there who can relate. See, last year around this time, my parents told my brothers and I that they were moving...and that they were selling our childhood home. Let me just say that this is a WONDERFUL move for them...they are moving to Boston, where my father works, and my mom was retiring from teaching. However, this is a process for children, no matter how old...and I'm hoping to find some humor, some truth, and some peace in this process.

Hope you will join me on this journey...